finding the one

Taking some time out to analyze our lives is an activity that many people should engage in as often as they can. This is a time that you will reflect on your life, values and the nature of relationships you have with the people that surround you both at work and in your home.

Many people started life out living alone or with friends, sharing rent and searching for a job, eventually getting a job and becoming more financially independent, the next action in their lives will seemingly be the “wedding’. It should be a colorful event that will turn out to be a gathering of happy friends and family. Meeting the in-laws and getting to know each other better. This will be a dream that will be experienced many nights until it eventually happens.

 …What if it never happens? What if you never get to meet your soul mate? What if you’re one of those people who are just meant to live their lives all alone till they are old and grey?

These are thoughts that many people have never allowed to come into their minds. The reasons are obvious and understandable. There should be no reason to exempt you from an activity that happens so often in the community. It is every body’s wish to be in a relationship that should end with a marriage. Nobody will fancy the thought of living alone for the rest of their lives.

finding the one

Many people have approached the issue of finding love in different ways. There have been many articles published on the internet prescribing the best ways to go about finding the one. The funny thing is that many people will deny that they have gone out of their way to become friendly with someone who potentially can become the one. A close observation will reveal that many of our decisions have been geared towards finding the one. This is the reason why we have always made our skirts appear tighter, or getting that tone of jeans.

You will also acknowledge that most of the social events you have attended were prepared for with a feeling at the back of your mind that you might meet a good person to fall in love with and eventually get married to. This is the reason why you spent an extra time delicately applying your makeup and running the brush carefully through your hair. Thinking about love has changed your lifestyle in many ways that you can imagine.

What if every notion about falling in love was removed from your mind? What if a priest tells you that you will never find love? The reactions to this comment will vary depending on the person involved. Many people will immediately begin to see how they can prove this prediction wrong. This will mean that they will go out of their way in view of finding the one. Other people will resign to this fate with a consolation that they can do without love. They will immediately start to think of other ways to become distracted. These reactions are normal. It might take a while but eventually, you will realize that you have actually been limiting yourself because of love.

There are many things that you could have done for yourself but you have constantly postponed accomplishing them because going for it “will spoil your chances of finding the one” in your opinion. Then there are the doctrines that have been drummed into your ears as a young child and all through your life from the movies you watched to the romantic novels you read. These materials seem to project a life where it is not possible for someone to live life to its fullest alone. You have been constantly suppressing the ambition to achieve more while waiting for a partner who will complement you to bring out your better side.

Things would definitely have been different if you grew up knowing that there will be a high chance that you will be alone. It can only be imagined, the extent you would have gone to please yourself and make the best out of every situation you find yourself all through your life. Taking full advantage of not being accountable to anyone can be exhilarating. This will mean you can wake up one morning and suddenly decide to go on a vacation. You will not have to look over your shoulder while indulging in sweet delicacies that are termed “junk foods”. Educationally, you will be free to advance your education to the highest point possible without giving any thought to the family time you owe a partner. There will also be a difference in your relationships. You will relate with the people around you differently when you are not expecting any form of advances from them. With a free mind you will be happy to be “just friends”.

The freedom of living life on your own terms will make things positively uplifting in every aspect of your life. There will be a peace that comes with removing the notion of “finding the one” from your mind. There will be more time to develop yourself and become a better you. A person that will be envied everywhere you go. Looking at it from this perspective will be more revealing. You will start working on creating in you, the partner you have been searching for all your life.

It is retrogressive to stall your life and unlimited potentials while waiting for someone who might never show up. Live freely and live happily. Let the whole world revolve around you, the effects will be awesome. You will be your own support, hence becoming stronger and more emotionally stable. You will be there in times of sorrow and when things are good. You will not need anyone to pull you up from any mess because you are already capable of handling yourself.

It is time to start appreciating your gifts and what you can achieve independently. Limiting yourself to what a partner will influence you to agree on will always leave a feeling of regret and dissatisfaction at the back of your mind. You have a strong mind, express it.

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